Last Sunday, the 29th, I laid down in the afternoon to take a nap. When I woke up, my back was out. This hasn't happened since April. So I got the heating pad out and put it in my chair. I took Alieve and it didn't touch it. Monday came around and it was just as bad. I made an appointment to see my Dr. I went and she didn't do much. Told me to keep taking the pain meds I've been on for a year (that doesn't do anything for the back pain). I went home defeated. Tuesday rolled around and I had to be at the Jungle Gym by 8:30. I did NOT want to go and let my boss/friend know I wouldn't be 100% due to my back issues. I was in SO much pain Tuesday morning and I begged for 1:00 to come. Finally it did and I went home to my chair. I made an appointment to go see my Chiro and he helped a little bit. At least my tilted pelvis was back in place. Then home to get back on the heat.
Wednesday morning I woke up with even worse pain. I went back to my Dr. and this time, he pressed three times on my back, told me it was the weather and a strain and sent me off with a prescription for Percocet. That's what was given to me in April. The time in April, it lasted a few days and I was back to normal. But this time has been MUCH different; my spine is greatly involved. He told me that he looked at the x-rays that were taken in April and he saw the start of arthritis and that my back pain could be from the weather changing to cold. I highly doubted it. I just saw it as an excuse so nothing else could be done. I want an MRI, but my Dr has no intention of having me get one.
As the week progressed, my back didn't get any better. My attitude about the whole thing was growing very dim as well. I could feel the depression coming back. Not as strong as before because my life, in a whole, has gotten a LOT better. But I felt the new joy and happiness that has filled my heart, slowly growing sad. And the number one reason was: I couldn't go to the gym. That has been killing me EVERY single day. I WANT TO BE BACK AT THE GYM!!!!!!!!!! Even if I just ride the bike, I will be back.
Times will come when obstacles get in your way of getting healthy and fit; just as you've seen with me. My advice to you is to not let it get you down. Take the precautions you need so you can heal and get back to the gym or however you work out. Start back slowly. My plan for when I head back to the gym this coming Monday is to ride the bike you sit in, not on...so there's no pressure on the back. I've also used the 10 lb weights I have here in my room. Just don't give up! Don't lose the truth that you're worth it. Set backs will come. That doesn't mean your self-worth is set back as well. No...that means you have to fight harder to keep it close and not lose it.
I wish I could write more, but my back is telling me to shut it down. Apparently the only chair my back likes is the one I should sleep in at night. I just have a hard time since Daisy, my dog, sleeps with me and I don't normally sleep on my back. Although today I took a three hour nap in my chair. Thanks to the Percocet!
So in closing....DON'T GIVE UP!!!!! Depression might come, but DO NOT GIVE UP!!!!!!!!! You got this and you WILL win!!! :)
